Things Fall Apart

While reading that classic novel by Achebe in English, the title could just as easily apply to my love life.



The Boyfriend is now the Ex-Boyfriend.



Truth is, I've been planning to rid myself of this relationship for quite some time now. Why? Because the boy is like a Shih zu from a puppy mill, meaning he is:

1.neurotic

2.insists upon constant attention and affection, lest he get whinier than he is already

3.Unstable

4.refuses to take the lead

5.far too desirous of getting his hooked nose into my past

6.arrogant and condescending



OK, I'll admit the last 3 traits do not pertain to an unstable puppy, but my point is made.

Interestingly enough, it was not my insufferable inability to stop being an ice queen and express my emotions (something I dislike doing), although that may have been a factor. The final catalyst was in fact a friend whom I will call The Christian, simply because he is very passionate about his faith. The Ex-Boyfriend knew I liked The Christian for quite a while, and asked me if I had a thing for him. I responded, knowing that this may very well break 'us', "He's attractive, fascinating and we get along very well but it's not going to happen anytime soon" and like that, it was over. He wasn't willing to wait for him to return my affections, to be my stand-by boyfriend.

I couldn't help but be pleased, he was out of my romantic life and I was free to fantasize about the Christian (for every major fight we had prior to the break up [and these were very frequent] I couldn't help but think about the best guy for me, and his face always flitted to the surface)



The next day however, he proved that I had made a grave mistake in dating him, calling me "a bad girlfriend" and denying anything we had, saying that a friend of ours was correct in saying that our relationship was 'physically based'. It seems a persons character is truly revealed at their lowest times. He blamed me entirely (I will admit I was not blameless) This will be one very ugly break up.



Today however, was wonderful. The Best Friend and I schemed and lied our way into seeing The Gentleman and The Christian in the village today (village=downtown area) We meandered our way through the area, stopping to get coffee. The Christian looked really good though, short blond-brown hair and green-blue eyes (I may write another post to tell my non-existent readers of how we met) and a black t-shirt. The Gentlemen wore his usual attire of khakis and a white button down shirt (He's definitely from Victorian England, a relic of the past). Either way, The Christian and I flirted endlessly and we slipped behind the Gentlemen and Best Friend, seeking to give them privacy. I poked him and he grabbed my hand,

and laced his fingers through mine

squeezed my hand slightly

and slipped away.

I should have held on.